My kind of race

So I read online about this little race that is going to happen in Portland on Friday night. It is a type of race I have always wanted to do. I wasn't sure if my training was up to speed but because of the long cold nights this time of year I was getting more training in than I would say in the summer. I get bored when it gets dark early so I really workout these skills during this season. I asked Gail if she wanted to do it? She said sure if we only have to do two. Yep, two laps is all you have to do. And drink two 8 ounce beers. This was the to be my first Beer Relay. The post said come down to Duniway track at 8:30 pm. You will drink one 8 oz. beer, run one lap then drink another 8 oz beer and run another lap. "Cool! I can do that!" So we I invited my Slug running friends to join in. They all wussed out except "maybe" oh I mean Katie.

So we are at home getting ready and at 7:30 pm I get a call from Katie. "Hey I am here and its dark and no one is here". OK I say we will be there around eight. We arrive and there is Katie sitting alone in the dark on the bleachers. She jumps in the car and we chat for a bit. No one shows up. Then a few folks are milling around. We decide to take a few warm up laps. More people show. We ask they say "It's gonna start all the other side of the track at 8:45, they are getting the beer now." Awesome I think. This is gonna happen.

So we go to the far side of the track. About 20 folks are there. The guy who is putting it on is charging 15$. Half will go to the top 3 finishers and half to an Ethiopian relief fund. The RD begins to tell us how this works. Remember we think we only have to drink 2-8 oz beers and run two laps. He says "Here is how it works. You will drink 8 ounces of beer, then we will say go and you will run one lap. You have 2 minutes to finish one lap or you are out. After that two minutes you drink another 8 ounces of beer and that is completed in 2 minutes or you are out. Then we yell go and you run another lap, then drink another beer in 2 minutes. We continue this til the last runner is left. So to recap you are out if you can't run the lap in 2 minutes, drink you beer in two minutes or if you throw up. Any questions?" I get this look from Gail. "Two minutes??? Thats fast! Plus we keep drinking??? This wasn't what I was told." Secretly I am thinking this is perfect. This is going to be hard and fun. Katie says "What?? I thought we would leisurely sit on the bleachers, sip a beer then jog a lap and repeat. What is this??"

So we get handed our beers. "Two minutes til we run, drink up!" So down it goes. Good beer too. Not bud, miller etc but we got microbrews. Then someone yells "Go!" and we drop our cups and take off. Oh how I hate running fast. Gail leads me til the last corner. We are really moving here, 6 minute pace or so for a mile. We cross the line and they hand us another beer. I put mine down quick. Gail is working hers down. Katie can't do it. Not going down for her so she is out. Next lap off we go. We get done and Gail says enough or maybe she did 3 I can't remember. (Wonder why? :) ) Off we go again, and again and again. Each time I come around I get Gail looking at me with that eye that says "you said only a couple of laps". The young guys are all way ahead of me now during the run but I am still making the cutoff by 15 seconds or so. I got everyone by at least 15 years here. My only goal is not to be the first guy to quit or DQ. Finally after 7 laps one the guys hurls. Yep I am so happy. So I drink my drink and run the 8th lap ( 2 miles). I was going to make the cutoff time again but I stopped running prior to the finish line to ensure my DQ. Hey! I had a 20 mile training run set up for the next morning! But this sure was fun. Last few laps were tough with all the bloated stomach and burping and tired legs. But the old guy survived!


Katie's cousin Ruben post chunks


See it wasn't all just guys that raced.


So we stayed to see who would win. It was down to about 8 guys. They just kept going. Katie's cousin Ruben was leading on most laps. Around lap 15 he finally tossed his cookies. Guys were losing it everywhere. One guy right on the track in front of us when they said "Go!". Oh we were laughing. Then TC (name protected to save him a beating from his wife) was getting pretty funny. Taking off his shirt at first and letting his big white belly hang out. He would rant about how he was fat and all these skinny runner guys couldn't beat him. Soon his shorts were pulled up like a sumo wrestler, cheeks hanging out and everything. And around they went.

Running, beers and too many laughs.



Running and beer. What a combo!

Soon they were over 20 laps! (20 small beers too!) and it was down to maybe 3 guys. One runner as he finished a lap said "The fat guy won't barf!!". Oh how we laughed. Gail was making me cry she was laughing so hard. Then it happened, we thought it might. TC removed all clothes except his shoes. Yep streaking was back in style. It was down to two runners. Off they went. And then the worst thing happened. They collided and both fell! One with no clothes on, face first! Oh this was gonna be ugly. But wait! He is up and he wins this lap. Amazing and no blood too.


The girl runners. Megan, Katie and Gail.

Well Katie is trying to be a good samaritan and help TC get his shorts back on. But he is pretty buzzed and can't get his legs in the holes in the shorts. Katie is directly behind him. Oh she was brave. No time, shorts still off and they take off again for another lap. Remember these guys are still running sub 2 minute laps! This is tough stuff not just a drinking game. They both make it in again. This time TC falls down on the grass. He is trying to get his shorts back on but has both legs in one hole in his shorts. He is wallowing on the ground. They yell go. He screams "Wait!!!!" But it is too late. The other runner takes off. TC gets up and takes off running but disappears into the bushes a the corner of the first lap. So our winner crosses and he has all of his clothes on.

TC with his Sumo outfit showing us his skill

I know a few of you will think this a bit over the top and yeah it might be but boy it was sure fun. One of those bucket list things I always wanted to do. But I am glad I had a long run scheduled so I wasn't one of those losing my lunch on the track. It went to a good cause and what else would I have done on Friday night? Watch TV???

Swillin' and swooshin'

Thanks Megan for all the Pictures!